Where In The Flying F### Did My Balloon Go?

By Lisa D. Watson

Your anxiety may be from germs, cockroaches, a group of four or more guys wearing baseball caps, red meat, I Am Legend type of zombies, alligators, Kid Rock…

Okay, the above is my personal uneasiness list but doesn't normally cause me anxiety. Ecoanxiety is what keeps me awake at night.

The American Psychological Association defines ecoanxiety as “a chronic fear of environmental doom” As the definition suggests, ecoanxiety is a state of mind that arises gradually as we watch the slow and unfortunate consequences of climate change unfold.

I was nine years old when I realized humans were not treading lightly and instead were carelessly stomping around the planet like a Marvel character having a shitty day. It was around the time President Jimmy Carter made a national announcement to turn off lights when not in use. To this day Mr. President, I turn out those lights!

My Northern Ohio elementary school had an event called ‘Up Day’. We all wrote a note, tied it to a latex balloon, filled the balloons with helium and in 3, 2, 1…released hundreds of balloons into the sky. It was so exciting and I’ll never forget watching them all float gracefully into the distance. We all stood there until the last balloon was out of sight.

In the weeks and months to come, many students received notes from people finding the balloons from all over the United States and Canada. Almost a year later, someone in Alaska sent a nice note back to a lucky student. But, that’s when my ecoanxiety started. No one found my balloon.

So, where in the flying fuck did my balloon go?

If a balloon was found in Alaska, that means many of the balloons landed in National Parks, lakes, pastures or the ocean!!! Is a dolphin chowing down on my stupid balloon?!!! I felt like shit.

Skip to the present day, and I still get anxiety from balloons. Honestly, there are so many one-use idiotic products that humans just keep buying and buying and buying. But, balloons have a twisted irony about celebration, joyfulness and freedom that makes my Norepinephrine spin out of control.

Whether the balloon is made of latex, mylar or vinyl, they all contribute to carbon emissions in their production and end up as non-biodegradable litter everywhere.

Also, let's not forget there is a worldwide shortage of helium. Once it is gone, it is extinct. Helium has many more important uses like treating Emphysema…a little more important than Todd’s retirement party.

###

more stories from impact magazine…